Me: “Not quite. Your total comes to $20.”
Pink Guy: “Are you kidding me!? You make me go through all that and then you expect me to fork over $20? I have insurance! It covers everything! You must not have run it through, you idiots. Go check your little computer and you’ll see. I have never had to pay anything for my meds!”
(I go to the computer and refresh his information.)
Me: “It shows here we ran it through [Insurance]. They paid [amount] toward the prescription, leaving you with a co-pay of $20. The last time you got it, on [date], they paid [amount minus $20] and therefore you had a $40 co-pay. And you’ve had a $40 co-pay the last 3 times you picked this medication up.”
Pink Guy: “This is ridiculous! Whatever.” *pulls out his checkbook* “Can I get $100 cash-back?”
Me: “No, sir, the limit is $50. And, I’m sorry, but I don’t have enough in my till.”
Pink Guy: “Well… can’t you get more?”
Me: “I could, but it’d be faster for you if you just got a bottle of water and get cash-back up at the front.”
Pink Guy: *standing up defiantly* “I’m not making two transactions. I’ll wait.”
Me: “Okay. Your total is $70, and the date is [date].”
Pink Guy: “You said it was $20 before!”
Me: “Right. $20, plus $50 cash-back is $70.”
(He proceeds to write his check.)
Pink Guy: “Can I have my cash-back?”
Me: “I need to run the check first.”
(With a great show of impatience and contempt he tears the check out and hands it to me. It’s policy to verify the check by hand before running it through the feeder. Before even turning it my direction, I see he hasn’t signed it.)
Me: “Could you please sign the check?”
(He clicks his pen and makes a very dramatic and flourish display of signing the check.)
Me: “Thank you.” *I start to validate the check, the date is wrong by a few days* “I’m going to change it to today’s date and initial it, okay?”
Pink Guy: “Fine, whatever.”
(I check everything, saving the amount for last since I know it’s cash-back and I want to verify they match properly. But… there’s a problem.
Me: “Sir, I’m afraid I’ll need you to write a new check.”
Pink Guy: “What the he-why!?”
Me: “Because. You wrote the amount for $120, but the limit for cash-back is $50, and that’s how much I asked for.”
Pink Guy: “Well here!” *takes the check from me, scribbles all over it, and writes the new amounts in as tiny as he can above the errata* “There. You need my driver’s license?”
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